-Posted by Sage

Like Kim, I was a shipper long before there was a word for it. I shipped 80s cartoons and characters in terrible, short-run 90s sitcoms. I could not be stopped. (For the definition of “shipper” and Kim’s Top 5 TV Kisses, go to her post here.) So when a favorite TV kisses post was suggested, I basically had my Top 5 already selected, ranked, and laminated on a handy wallet-sized card.

How do you know if a TV kiss was a good one? If you look like this at work or school the next day, that’s a pretty good indicator:

Dreamy Cinderella

Without further ado, here are my Top 5 TV makeout moments. Get it, everyone:

Pacey and Joey

5) Pacey and Joey, “Cinderella Story”, Dawson’s Creek

“And you call me in the middle of the night to pick you up…why?”
“Well I’m sorry that I called, I thought that I-“
“I’m not mad that you called me, i just want to know why you called me.”
“You were the first person that I thought of, Pacey.”
“And what does that mean, Jo?”
“It means…I guess it…it means that I can talk to you and that you’re there for me.”
“Don’t you ever get tired of talking?”

Pacey Witter has always been and will always be TOO GOOD for Joey Potter. This kiss has the benefit of coming at the end of a “THAT’S IT,” pulling-over-to-the-side-of-the road moment, and also of SHUTTING HER UP.

Ten and Rose on New Earth

4) Cassandra in Rose’s Body and the Tenth Doctor, “New Earth”, Doctor Who

What’s with the voice?”
Oh I don’t know, just larking about. New Earth. New me.”
Well I could talk, New New Doctor.”
Mmm.. aren’t you just?”

Because life is cruel, Season 2 of Doctor Who never shows us a kiss between Ten as Ten and Rose and Rose, even though they are the most flawless OTP and daily break my heart. ANYWAY, the first post-Christmas special episode of this season gave us the last human, Cassandra, alternating between inhabiting the bodies of both the main characters. To paraphrase showrunner Russell T. Davies, Cassandra finds herself in a real, active human body for the first time in years (THIS BODY, no less), has access to a foxy Time Lord, and just goes for it. She even ruffles the hair. No one can blame her, and I’m pretty sure Rose and Ten didn’t mind.

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3) Ben and Leslie, “Road Trip”, Parks and Recreation

“Uh oh.”

Ben Wyatt’s arrival in Pawnee and subsequent fall for Leslie Knope brought so much more to this show than Leslie’s previous succession of awkward boyfriends. This whole episode brings the tension to the brink. Chris sends Team Beslie on a road trip to pitch Pawnee as the site of the Indiana Little League Championships, just when Leslie has decided to stay away from our favorite Sexy Elf King and keep her job. Even her mixtape of unsexy banjo music and John Hopkins dorm room conversation can’t keep Ben from telling her how he feels. But Chris Traeger ruins the moment by having literally the worst timing on the planet and possibly the smallest bladder. Once they’re back at home, sly dog Ben makes up a reason for Leslie to come to his office, and finally, finally makes the move. I kept a window with the 27 second Youtube clip of this open in my browser for about a week and a half after it happened. No shame.

Jim and Pam on Casino Night

2) Jim and Pam, “Casino Night”, The Office

You have no idea… “
Don’t do that.”
…what your friendship means to me.”
Come on. I don’t want to do that. I wanna be more than that.”

Oh, The Office. When it was good, it was good. The second season finale, “Casino Night,” finally paid off all of the “JUST KISS HER” moments from the first two series. John Krasinski plays the parking lot confession perfectly, especially that single tear. SINGLE TEAR. I still can’t watch it without flailing. Pam tells Jim that he’s misinterpreted their friendship; he knows she’s full of shit and calls her on it with this amazing kiss. Season ends, I die.

Mulder and Scully Triangle

1) Mulder and Scully, “Triangle”. The X-Files

“So if I don’t turn this ship around…”
“In all likelihood, I won’t exist. And neither will you. So, in case we never meet again…”

If this is what happens when you get lost in the Bermuda Triangle, then book my ticket. Mulder ends up aboard the Queen Anne in 1939 with a lady in a hot red dress who happens to look exactly like Dana Scully. He decides that now might be his only chance, probably because he read all of those Chris Carter interviews where he said they’d never, ever get together. He’s rewarded with a right cross, (“I was expecting the left.”) but messageboards still exploded errrrywhere.

What do you think, fellow shippers? Which epic kisses did we miss?